Before I Was Spoken For...

I'd like to think that we were pretty damn prepared. The week before the wedding I continuously emailed our coordinator (With Bells On Productions) and asked her what we were forgetting. We did well... we were on it. For some reason though that seemed to stress me out even more. I was stressed that I was leaving something out, and spending restless nights trying to think about what I was forgetting seemed to be my business leading up to the wedding.

The week before the wedding we had family come to town. They all stayed with us. All together 10 people at our house for the few days leading up to the wedding. Family that had never even met one another, living in close quarters. We went 0 to 60 QUICKLY. Thank God we each have friendly families, because that could have been bad. MRS. Temple of Groom's family was the first to arrive to our house, then my family filtered in. Reality quickly set in that the wedding was coming. Mistakenly I figured that the days leading up to the wedding would be filled with lounging and relaxation - feeling more like when we go back home for the holidays and less like a hurricane of wedding related content.

We decided to have a huge bbq for extended family that was in LA at our house 3 days before the wedding. With the help of our families we pulled it off, and it was a very nice night. Looking back though I kinda have to ask ourselves if we're gluttons for punishment! We could have spent that night relaxing with our families...but it was their first time with one another - it called for celebration. Additionally one last large detail that needed to be planned - our parents really wanted us to turn the guest house at the Cass House Inn (where we got married) into a hospitality suite. The night before the wedding, we had a meet & greet and invited anyone that was already in Cayucos to come have a bite to eat, have a drink or two (or 5), and hang out with my family. Also, they bought enough alcohol to stock in the suite so anyone that wanted to party after the wedding reception was over, could filter in and get his/her drink on - This proved to be a LOT of work for our families. Well all the work was worth it, the meet & greet the night before the reception such a nice evening and a way for our families to meet one another. Maybe planning two huge parties before the wedding was not the best idea - but it was the first time we had our entire family together - so it just seemed like we should take advantage of that fact.

Rebecca and I did a good job organizing everything we needed for the wedding into our storage room, but when you added all the hospitality suite necessities to the mix, it was overwhelming! So much stuff. Luckily my sister-in-law brought her boyfriend who was trying to make a good impression on the family and seems like an overall workhorse was "happy" to do the heavy lifting when it came to loading the car! While I wouldn't do anything differently if I got to relive the week over again, I do wish that there had been time for our family to just be with one another and relax a little bit. Rebecca and I were getting no sleep due to the wedding jitters and spending the nights on the couch. It was making for a pretty stressful week even though we had everything under control. That's the worst part of weddings. They are more stress than just about anything and you tend to take your stress out on loved ones. At least they understand.... it just sucks. The whole thing is so backwards - your family comes to town BEFORE the wedding, and you want to scream because you've got so much to do - then you have the wedding and it's perfect, then when you're so relaxed and calm, the family leaves. It seems so backwards. Our families left right when we were ready to just veg out and enjoy them! Alas, that's not how things work out - and it's a good thing that they are family and can understand we're just at our wits end w/ stress.

The night before the wedding I actually slept pretty well. I'm not sure if that's because I had my own room, with a bed, instead of the couch, or if it was because I knew that everything I worked SO hard for over the last year and a half was about to pay off in a major way. It was so weird to say goodnight to Rebecca and then leave her in her own room. I like the fact that not sleeping with one another the night before the wedding and not seeing one another before the festivities start builds anticipation, but it's just so weird to be apart before such a monumental occasion. Before bed I considered writing my last blog post as a single man, but i just decided to take in the moment. So many people have given me the advice to relax and try to take in everything because it will blow by so quickly. So that's what I did. I laid in bed by myself and just relaxed. There was not one nerve coursing through my veins that was nervous about marrying Rebecca. Instead I was nervous/excited to see what the day would look like. For a year and a half we spent so much time working on each individual detail of the wedding - it became hard to step back and see the big picture. I was so anxious to see what the entire day was going to look like. Would the details that we'd come up with really going to pay off, and would our guests think they were as cool as we did? I couldn't WAIT to see everything and everyone come together. It almost felt like it was never going to happen. I feared that something wouldn't go as planned. It's been my experience, with most events, that there's bound to be a hiccup somewhere. Murphy's Law rears its ugly head somewhere and things don't go exactly as planned.... what would that detail be that didn't pan out? Right before bed I took one last stroll outside around the grounds of the Cass House. I walked down the lawn where we'd be married, and around to the opposite side of the house where our reception would be. The calm before the storm. A chilly central California coast night. I was glad that we upped the amount of heaters we needed. That walk around the house got me so excited, and made me realize that no matter what - if Murphy's Law bites us in the ass, everything will still be okay - we will still get married, and that's the most important element of the day.

I'm Married!

I haven't posted anything for a while. My last post was so long ago that I'm a completely different man than my previous posting self.... Now I am MR. Temple of Groom. That's right. I'm MARRIED! What an awesome whirlwind the last few weeks have been. What an incredible release of stress. I can't wait to tell you everything. Ceremony details, things I learned, etc etc... I think this week will be filled with blog posts!

There's so much to cover. I can now give you details to things I didn't want to talk about on the blog, which wound up being a smart decision. I quickly realized that more of my invited guests read my blog than I originally thought. The fact that I broadcasted that I was going to wear converse shoes with my suit caused more confusion with my male invitees than it should have. "We know that the invitation says 'cocktail attire' but we also know that David plans to wear converse with his suit, does this mean we can wear t-shirts?" I'm slightly exaggerating, but it did cause issues. SO, I left out a lot of my wedding details with the knowledge that soon after the wedding happened I would post about them. And it will keep me blogging for a little while.

I'm trying to think of the best plan of attack to post everything....do I do one huge post about the wedding, do I post about things in chronological order?

For now, I just want to post that I'm married. It was the best day of my life. Everything was so perfect. The day was flawless. The day couldn't have been more catered to Rebecca and me.... god, I wish we could do it all over again.

Bubble Boy

The wedding is officially "THIS WEEKEND". You have no idea how in-fucking-sane that feels to say that. I'm getting exponentially more excited as each day passes, but at the same time I'm getting exponentially more scared.

It's definitely not nerves or cold feet - I'm scared that I'm going to either physically or cosmetically fuck myself up before the wedding. By the way, I'm totally writing this blog post as I wear a crest white strip on my teeth. I have 27 more minutes to finish up before I have to go take this off.

People, I'm downright nervous to leave the house. Every time someone cuts me off on the freeway I ask myself if this is the asshole that's going to ruin me for my wedding. I keep waiting for that giant underground zit that I get on my nose from time to time to rear its ugly face. So, I wash my face thoroughly... but can I overwash my face? I'm scared of that too.

I've been taking a vitamin that my parents got me a few months ago called Purple Defense. I have no idea what's in it, and for all I know it could probably just be crushed up kool aid powder - but honestly it helped me fight off a sore throat last week. I haven't gotten my annual cold yet this year. When I get a cold, I get a fucking cold. I do it right. I'm anticipating getting one on friday and it scares the shit out of me.

A few weeks ago I planned my bachelor party. I will post more about that later this week, but basically I rounded up about 20 of my friends on a saturday morning and we played flag football on a high school football field. Oddly enough I wasn't really scared that I would hurt myself there because it would be TOO perfect. Of course the groom that schedules a football game when he's lost 85% of his athleticism would get hurt at the party... it was just too perfect so I actually wasn't scared. BUT you can bet your ass I was afraid running down the stairs of my house to leave for the game. A trip and a fall because I was too excited to go play ball seems like it would be perfectly fitting. Side note, the game was fun and I couldn't move for a week because my muscles were so sore, but it was great.

Lastly I'm completely fearful to go outside without a proper SPF because I do burn pretty easily. That's what I want, my face to be peeling the morning of my wedding. On the complete other side of the spectrum I'm nervous to stay IN the house because my white pasty face can and will only get pastier... there's no way to win here. I guess the only way to win is to stay inside and then get someone to come in and fake tan me! You think I'm joking but I'm completely serious. I recently had a conversation with Chris from The Man Registry about tanning. He said that while he doesn't want to out any of his friends, he's known quite a few guys that have tanned before the wedding. I think it's a pretty solid idea. I'm worried about looking orange, but I think I've found someone incredible that could potentially do a great job. Her name is Jenna and she runs a company called Here Comes the Sun. The name is worth hiring her alone. She'll come to the house so I don't have to be seen sneaking in and out of a tanning salon. I'm really considering this because she PROMISES me it'll be completely natural. A few weeks ago she tanned the wedding party of a wedding I attended, and they all looked natural.

SO, all that being said, I'm kind of ready to purchase a giant bubble, a hazmat suit, or ANYTHING else that will shield me away from society for the next week. I refuse to touch shopping carts with my bare hands, and prior to eating food from any restaurant, I think I'm going to need to talk with the cooks to make sure they aren't, haven't been, or getting sick. I'm seriously freaked out. Is this normal before the wedding?

Comment away. I'm going to go take off my crest white strip and I'll be back to see if you all think I'm crazy.

What to do?

I've got so many damn things to post about. Just a few days away from the wedding I don't have any shortage of things to talk about. So many awesome great things to type and the excitement is really setting in.

That being said, I need to get something off my chest because right now I'm really upset. One of my all time best friends just wrote me an email telling me he's not coming to my wedding. Thanks for the 6 days of notice. He says he's just got budget issues right now and can't afford to come out here. That would have been a great and fine excuse had it come 2 months ago when our invitations were sent. I definitely understand and empathize. However, all this tells me is that he obviously had no intentions to come if he's looking to score cheap airfare a week before the wedding. Of course it won't fit in your budget if you're just planning the trip now!

My question to you, is do I write him an email to let him know how I really feel? Tell him how upset this makes me, or do I just swallow this, and type back something along the lines of "okay, we'll miss you"? I keep going back and forth in my head. On one hand what will an email really telling him I'm upset accomplish? He'll feel bad, will I feel better? Is it worth it? On the other hand, what he did isn't okay, and he should know, right? I just don't know what to do. This really sucks that I have to even think about this a few days before the wedding.

What should I do?

Let There Be Cake

Okay, I'm a hypocrite. At least I can admit that though. If you've been a blog follower of mine for a while now, you'll know what I'm talking about.

That's right, we are having a wedding cake. HOWEVER, it's only a cake for us to cut into. All this being said, let me get defensive for a moment. We are on a very tight budget. We literally had to turn pennies into dimes. I say literally because for the last year and a half in my basement I've been working on a machine that turns pennies into dimes. See the big stores only have pens that check if a $100 bill is fake, but they don't have pens that check our dimes! Of COURSE we get odd looks from our vendors when we pay for everything in dimes, and yes, a couple of them have called us out that the dimes are a weird coppery silver color and don't have a real shape to them, and YES I may have drawn Roosevelt's face with crayon on top of Lincoln, but results are results. We're getting married in 9 days and it's all thanks to my penny pincher (which is a trademarked name).

Oh my god, what am I typing? Wedding stress has gotten the best of me. Oh, right, cakes. Okay so yes, we're on a budget and the main reason Rebecca and I weren't big on cake is because there's usually a big budgetary concern that comes with having a cake. Not only is the cake expensive, and rightfully so for some of these awesome works of art, but also, sometimes the wedding venue slams you with fees such as cake cutting fees, bringing in cake from outside vendor fees, etc etc.

That being said Rebecca and I definitely wanted some sort of desert to feed one another. A macaroon is a favorite of hers, so that would work, a tartlet, anything. It just didn't matter. But, at our last meeting with our venue, as we were working out our wedding menu the issue of cake came up. They asked us if we wanted a cake, just something small to cut into. We said no, that we'd rather have other desserts. Then they said a magical word that changed everything, "free". That leveled the playing field. I realize that there won't be enough cake to go round. Not everyone is going to get a slice. But you know what?.... fine! I'm okay with that. We've got plenty of other incredible desserts that will be on that table, and people will be happy. Rebecca and I aren't deny ourselves to partake in one of the most typical wedding traditions there is. I wouldn't have been devastated or even saddened if we didn't get cake, but I can admit that it's really nice that we'll get to cut a cake and feed it to one another. Of course it won't be as grand and artistic as if we went to a genuine wedding cake artist (Fantasy Frostings) but it will be perfect for us.